Intimacy is the sharing of one’s soul with another person’s, depth of trust, and profound insights into each other. That level of emotional interaction strengthens character, focus and integrity. Social media and other outlets have degraded the concept of intimacy in relationships, as a “What’s in it for me?” mindset has settled in. Intimacy has been perverted from its respected form into something that is lacking in most relationships today.
The continuous degradation of intimacy in relationships has led to more couples seeking counseling.
FEAR OF INTIMACY
Intimacy can help you feel more loved and less alone. But intimacy also requires a great deal of trust and vulnerability, and you may find this frightening. Many people struggle with intimacy, and fear of intimacy is a common concern in therapy.
People can fear intimacy due to a variety of reasons. Some of the most common causes include:
- Abandonment Issues: You may fear that once you become attached to someone, that individual will leave.
- Fear of Rejection: You might worry that once you reveal any flaws or imperfections, the other person will no longer want to be with you.
- Control Issues: You may fear losing your independence as you become emotionally connected to others.
- Past Abuse: A history of childhood abuse, especially sexual abuse, may make it difficult for you to trust others.
BUILDING INTIMACY IN A RELATIONSHIP
It is possible to overcome fears of intimacy. A compassionate counselor can help you understand the underlying emotions driving your fear. They can help you address these feelings and find healthier ways to cope with them besides isolating yourself. Dr. April Brown is a Licensed Mental Health Christian Counselor, Certified School Counselor, Distance Certified Counselor, National Certified Counselor, and a Qualified Clinical Supervisor. She has a thriving private practice in Cape Coral and Fort Myers, Florida where she specializes in intimacy counseling
Sometimes mental health issues like avoidant personality disorder can also contribute to intimacy issues. Treating these diagnoses can also offer significant benefits.
The following suggestions may allow you and your partner to grow closer.
- Be patient. Getting to truly know someone is a serious time commitment. The trust-building process is often a slow one. Intimacy is not a race.
- Start with the easy stuff. If you find it easier to talk about the future than the past, then start by sharing your dreams and goals. As trust builds, you may find it less frightening to talk about the more difficult topics.
- Talk openly about your needs. Are you someone who needs a lot of time alone to recharge? How often do you like to have sex? You can prevent a lot of misunderstandings if you tell your partner plainly what you want instead of assuming your desires are “obvious”.
- Respect each other’s differences. Even the most intimate partners still have their own identities. You and your partner do not need to agree on everything in order to love each other.
Are you and your significant other struggling in your connection to one another? For some reason, that bond or closeness seems to be going away. There is a wall between you two. Intimacy coaching can help, because it is a process to help men and women who are struggling with the issues of love, intimacy, and romance, get the love and relationship they want.
In the coaching sessions, Dr. April will work on breaking down the walls that prevent intimacy through:
Exploring each person’s mind, body, and spirit
Uncovering each person’s thoughts, beliefs, and emotions that have been unconsciously forming their sexual attitudes and behaviors
Learning, understanding, and communicating each person’s needs, wants, and desires
Repairing and creating passionate strong bonds that will create and maintain satisfying intimacy.
For more information about intimacy coaching, contact Dr. April – where intimacy is real.