Have you noticed a real lack of connection in any of your relationships? This lack of connection can be family, friends, or a loved one. Although you may feel this lack of connection one thing is for sure, you are not alone. For most of us our problems or lack of connection with other people comes from a lack of connection with ourselves. It’s time we look self-intimacy as part of the overall problem with connecting with others intimately.
What is Self-Intimacy?
Self intimacy requires a daily check up to make sure you are fully aware of your emotions. Unchecked emotions turns into prolonged issues. Self-intimacy is the first critical step in getting to know ourselves — not only so that we can become closer with others — but so that we can finally see that we’re actually pretty perfect, just as we are. We know that in order to love others we must first love ourselves, it is the same for intimacy. Intimacy in relationships will only take place if each person first learns too be intimate with themselves.
How Can I Improve Self-Intimacy?
Thought you would never ask. First,
Find out what blockages are keeping your from having self-intimacy.
Insecurities play a major role in our ability to be self-intimate. Past trauma and abuse play a major roles in our insecurities not allowing any intimacy to develop in our lives. In addition, a lack of communication can seriously hamper any attempts to develop intimacy in our lives. Keep in mind one that of the most important components of intimacy is the ability to communicate. This also includes the inability to communicate effectively with our-selves. A lack of communication with one-self happens when we live in denial or are unable to see the reality of our decisions and actions.
Take care of yourself.
Isolation is not the key and can be painful for some. Peace and solitude, however, is one of life’s most precious gifts. Whether it’s spending a day at home alone or going out solo for coffee or a movie, doing things on your own can build confidence and help strengthen your inner bond. Or, why not go bold? Take yourself on a relaxing holiday or sign up for a new class without knowing a single person in it.
Dr. April Brown is a leading author in the development of self-intimacy and relationship intimacy. If your life is lacking the intimacy it so desperately needs contact us.